A Little Life Update, and a Pouring of thoughts…….

Hi Guys, thought i’d do a little catch up on here. I haven’t done much of this type of blog for a long time. After Covid hit- I tried to hide all emotions because everything seemed mundane to the bigger badder Pandemic waiting outside our front door.

This is not to say I struggled, because I really don’t think I did. Yes their were days I struggled, but overall, the Lock down was a blessing to my life.

My main concern were my Parents and Granni dearest (shes hitting 94 now! GO. Soldier!) but she has been protected so well by my parents that they have not had any problems. (Apart from having to stay indoors and each others face for far too long in the day. That’s torture in itself!)

good night sleep

Most of the content I put out or the intention of me starting a blog was based on my Travels, Afternoon Tea, London trips, and Spas, and damn do I miss all that. I am so grateful that I am fortunate enough to experience it all, but since last March things were put on a halt. (Although any chance Boris gave us- I was out and about)

And so my content started to dry up, and also changed a little focus. At first I was lost, what could I write about? I tried bits and bobs in between, but generally I had lost the passion for writing.

Whilst in Lock down I tried to invent a new version of me, by doing outfit reels, outfit hauls, makeup hauls….. but really I was just following a crowd. A popular crowd that I like to watch and read about myself, but I learnt that sometimes its just nice to see that, not BE that.

And as soon as I started it, I ended it too, (if you follow me on Insta, you’ll find all my reels and hauls have disappeared) As a blogger one thing I have learnt is, you cant force a passion and love into words for something you don’t have a love for.

However with these trials of re-invention, I found my love for skincare, and I am a tad obsessed over it too now! I also found that I love the Peace, I love the Home, and I sure as hell love my Cuppa Tea…… and the kiddos that live with me…. they are not too bad either. (hehe).

With the new Road-map in place for us for the Lock down Easing, and the vaccinations going out in the masses, we are following another change in our lives (things have not been consistent for a whole year now, but nothing seems real anymore) and its all made me think about where we will be going….. hence this blog post.

Is it OK for me to say I have anxiety over the future. Anxiety over going back to the old ‘Normal’. Life may have looked like ‘Perfect’ before Covid hit, but the reality is, it was anything but that (for me anyway). If anything Covid saved me from a lot of anxieties I had pre- covid, that I didn’t even realise I had. It was something that I just lived with and got on with.

Lock down gave me time to think about myself (for once), it opened up my eyes to the people I choose to be around. It allowed me to learn new skills, (still cant cook!) and it allowed me to be….. Me……. without the social constructs of what society wants from me, what culture wants from me, what my family want from me, what the wider world wants from me, or even what instagram wants from me.

I am not knocking what I had ‘before’, it was great, it was the best….. I just learnt to be better. That’s all. And there are certain parts that I am happy to leave behind. And leave behind I will.

I may have lost a year of my life whilst in Lock down, but the slow life that Covid brought to me, allowed me to process myself, and look inwards towards the person that mattered the most. Me.

I would love to know your thoughts on this? Are you looking forward to getting back to normal? Has life changed for you whilst in Lock down? How do you feel about the easing of the Lock down?

Love and Regards

M11bna

Follow me on Insta? No? Why not?! Its just here for you

m11bna

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